1. For teens, there’s only one thing that truly matters. It’s ME, ME, ME. Ask them what the weather is like and they’ll start to tell you about THEIR morning. Ask them how school went and you’ll hear all about that stupid teacher who just doesn’t get ME. Ask them take out the trash and you’ll hear how much work poor little ME needs to do.
2.Being so perfectly preoccupied with your own universe usually means nothing gets done on time. But from a teenager’s point of view that’s just as it should be, because NOBODY in this world can possibly understand what it’s like to be a unique person such as Sarah/Jessica/Mark/Peter/Susan….
3) For teens, getting dressed in the morning means, if you’re a boy: covering yourself up with the loosest, most ill-fitting garments you’ll find and – preferably – letting them hang below your butt. If you’re a girl, it’s just a question of avoiding to cover yourself up with anything short of 3 strings tied together and giving maximum exposure to your butt in the tightest garments God (or Miss Sixty) invented.
4) Making important phone calls or answering those ever-beeping text messages can be a matter of life and death. It’s just stupid adults who think that phone conversations should be conducted outside of lesson time or dinner table.
5) It’s perfectly possible to have meaningful conversations, eat breakfast/lunch/dinner, console friends, listen to lectures, go to church, babysit, play tennis, do homework, shop and see a doctor with your ear-plugs and IPod in full function and maximum volume. As a matter of fact, doing anything without it seems like sheer madness.